"indecision may or may not be my problem."
got culturally depressed last night by a blog entry + comments on a strangely popular blog called "plain layne". layne goes through a difficult breakup with her ex-girlfriend, but chooses to spend only two paragraphs on her emotions and these, too, are viewed through a materialistic prism: "her car", "her cardboard boxes", "her crates of vintage vinyl". what about her smile? her touch? her smell?
then the rest of the entry talks only about rent, loans, cars, plastic, power of attorney, 401K, checks and wallets. and this is the girl she wanted to marry! and the commenting crowd is piping the same tunes.
i'm aware that i'm probably biased by my mood, but this morning i just feel like i don't belong. to alleviate the pressure, i went to the common room and tuned into the israeli tv station. what a state of affairs it must be when i turn to israeli culture for some normality...
obviously it didn't take long for me to realize that i don't really belong there either (anymore?). so i basically have nowhere to go back to. immigration sucks today.
to quote ehud banai:
משהו התחיל לכרסם בי
כבר מאוחר מדי
עכשיו כבר לא כדאי
אין לאן לחזור, צריך להמשיך וללכת
i started to get that gnawing feeling
it's too late
now there's no point anymore
there's nowhere to return to, you just have to keep on walking
my new 10-year dream is to make a movie about immigration.
also someone told me that my blog was not personal enough. so there.
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content here by guy hoffman .. as seen times since march 2004